tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25783424122766719482024-03-13T23:37:38.392-07:00JokesJokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.comBlogger4387125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-10099741113493374252023-08-04T05:07:00.001-07:002023-08-04T05:07:40.591-07:00Atualização da nossa política de inatividade da Conta do Google<table width=100% height=100% style="min-width: 348px;" border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 lang=pt bgcolor=#FAFAFA role=presentation> <tr align=center> <td> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 bgcolor=#FAFAFA style=max-width:600px role=presentation> <tr> <td style=padding-top:20px;padding-bottom:20px;padding-left:40px;padding-right:40px> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td><img src=https://www.gstatic.com/images/branding/googlelogo/1x/googlelogo_color_112x36dp.png alt="" title=""></td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr> <td style=padding-left:15px;padding-right:15px> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td bgcolor=#ffffff style="padding:35px 35px 10px 35px;border-radius:4px"> <table border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Todos os dias, o Google trabalha muito para proteger você e suas informações particulares impedindo o acesso não autorizado à sua Conta do Google com nossas proteções de segurança integradas. Para isso, temos práticas de privacidade fortes em nossos produtos, que minimizam o tempo pelo qual armazenamos seus arquivos pessoais e quaisquer dados associados a eles. Queremos proteger suas informações particulares e impedir qualquer acesso não autorizado à sua conta, mesmo que você não use mais nossos serviços.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Por isso, estamos atualizando o <a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5oSLevvHnrJ_CH2YcWkDTbAMUBwZ0EYUOU83fIvx9maLEvnqWVvmFTTRA5nAQgFllHzv4yRP6HWVoGuogQNQ7jOiB716bZAU2uQ8LBjLKPsNJTqxz-HT0nc341ikcLabTjA3kTC72Eoyd_1wAwLZsRAQ8MEeDyw2FEiITQ2aDJslnNAQjd-GYseYLYZFAh-ABV5XkoXraoCJt4fHKWFGPYUEtqnlpK_035SEVpvW0eELSo>período de inatividade</a> das Contas do Google para dois anos em todos os nossos produtos e serviços. Essa mudança começa a ser lançada hoje e será aplicada a qualquer Conta do Google que estiver inativa, ou seja, que não foi conectada nem usada em um período de dois anos. Uma conta inativa e o conteúdo dela estarão qualificados para exclusão a partir de 1 de dezembro de 2023.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0 0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><b>Como isso afeta você:</b></p> <ul style="margin-top: 0;"> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Essas mudanças só vão afetar você <span style="font-weight: bold">se</span> a sua Conta do Google estiver inativa há dois anos ou se ela não tiver sido usada para fazer login em nenhum serviço do Google há mais de dois anos.</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Embora as mudanças entrem em vigor hoje, a primeira exclusão de conta só vai acontecer em <span style="font-weight: bold">dezembro de 2023</span>.</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Se a sua conta for considerada inativa, vamos enviar vários lembretes para ela e para os e-mails de recuperação (se houver) antes de tomarmos qualquer medida ou excluirmos o conteúdo da conta. Esses e-mails de lembrete serão enviados pelo menos oito meses antes de qualquer ação ser realizada na sua conta.</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Depois que uma Conta do Google é excluída, o endereço do Gmail dela não pode ser usado novamente ao criar outra Conta do Google.</li> </ul> <p style="margin:25px 0 0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><b>Como manter sua conta ativa?</b></p> <p style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">A maneira mais simples de manter uma Conta do Google ativa é fazendo login pelo menos uma vez a cada dois anos. Se você tiver feito login na sua Conta do Google dentro desse período, ela será considerada ativa e não será excluída.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0 0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Outras maneiras de manter a conta ativa:</p> <ul style="margin-top: 0;"> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Ler ou enviar um e-mail</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Usar o Google Drive</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Assistir um vídeo do YouTube</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Compartilhar uma foto</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Fazer o download de um app</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Usar a Pesquisa Google</li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Usar o recurso "Fazer login com o Google" em um app ou serviço de terceiros</li> </ul> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Esta política tem algumas exceções. Os exemplos incluem: uma Conta do Google com vídeos, canais ou comentários do YouTube, uma conta que tenha um vale-presente com saldo monetário ou uma conta que tenha um aplicativo publicado (como um app que hospeda outro na Google Play Store). Consulte outras exceções à política <a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5oSLevvHnrJ_CH2YcWkDTbAMUBwZ0EYUOU83fIvx9maLEvnqWVvmFTTRA5nAQgFllHzv4yRP6HWVoGuogQNQ7jOiB716bZAU2uQ8LBjLKPsNJTqxz-HT0nc341ikcLabTjA3kTC72Eoyd_1wAwLZsRAQ8MEeDyw2FEiITQ2aDJslnNAQjd-GYseYLYZFAh-ABV5XkoXraoCJt4fHKWFGPYUEtqnlpK_035SEVpvW0eELSo>neste link</a>.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Também oferecemos ferramentas para gerenciar sua Conta do Google e opções para fazer backup dos dados, incluindo a possibilidade de fazer o download deles usando o <a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5peJA6AvhdAdvG_hPyhwVP56Xqlv4GWWoXJiGu0kwE1DjeTP5RcFG0AtcwGVcx4ciLHvJYyH0aog3dYsPPqT9nIZRvzZH9S9qUznuA9av1CKkXm2Fc0KaYZL2ortmjzCQBDU4yvngGVjvKbvdo1YVX3dLWtsuiA-OHO5liTsXnC94K7NrpxrfhP5g>Takeout</a>. Além disso, você pode usar o <a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5rmUfDOzt1ShMGyICwgWNXr2BDomAxZviyB7-6RiP259l1BH2OahDo43hUDM_1tqfAQkdNK8-Bh6yVc016IF7Jk5Wt2dJkFrUnXd5VWQubA_uz_uf3LQvoZV33aeGfz1BGbiw1QdfLhJJuQeyvMuFTssRQRA_vCOHBp1Az_BL4SgQwWMB2HOdVM5yfVgV3vDG9HJWIcQcVR-MNaGXmC_bki>Gerenciador de contas inativas</a> para planejar o que vai acontecer com seus dados se a conta ficar inativa por um período específico.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Nossa prioridade é que, se você escolher deixar a conta ativa, não tenha dificuldades com isso. Vamos garantir que você receba um aviso adequado antes que uma conta seja afetada por essa mudança. Assim, vamos enviar notificações prévias para a Conta do Google e para o e-mail de recuperação dela, caso tenha sido fornecido, informando sobre a exclusão. Verifique se o seu <a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5qF4gtmrDxvWaPAguE4Eu0jF5BARA2PYpZcDIfRviOy_66XyEYo5BMHiWKwBUAPPk_ydKGKu7ZQjDmdLEb7ckGo91oRKLuwLUZ8UaQWWEo7Ov9fjhGOChCa6ucogLfDRfhXjbMXttLufac-g1r4vGAXVgXyyv-JjGi18U_C1GAsa51xkj-bzKrs5BOjQKZ5XL1_m3GJaFZH747L6JVq7z2r>e-mail de recuperação</a> está atualizado.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0 0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><b>Saiba mais</b></p> <ul style="margin-top: 0;"> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5oSLevvHnrJ_CH2YcWkDTbAMUBwZ0EYUOU83fIvx9maLEvnqWVvmFTTRA5nAQgFllHzv4yRP6HWVoGuogQNQ7jOiB716bZAU2uQ8LBjLKPsNJTqxz-HT0nc341ikcLabTjA3kTC72Eoyd_1wAwLZsRAQ8MEeDyw2FEiITQ2aDJslnNAQjd-GYseYLYZFAh-ABV5XkoXraoCJt4fHKWFGPYUEtqnlpK_035SEVpvW0eELSo>Política de Contas do Google Inativas</a></li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5rAb_n-9i1RGKVZ1KUePsmwghELUwyOALh3Etl2IAlvvckXejwFp2lKwOsrtIVALak6F0PsbxpeZVNddeU--AJ6SiPVJ0-RWxUKun_riFbleqiDaNmtW5af0U-N630D72_Tp4fyVihIG_ZdT7ZbnwvVTMokFw6yhG_Qjy6m0S0ur3Su38GmV3J8caVmKNHaLqSpWwE2eN77xZ7LUTh6r9cl>Como o Google retém os dados que coletamos</a></li> <li style="margin:0 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><a href=https://notifications.google.com/g/p/ANiao5r4Xl2UMGdFxjDfbYL1McZ5jhd77iqyLenedWlkRKjLWCxfVJYysUKcpxUo7jJyVqA9Yz6BN8-lwPw9F4voataPaiHQF2qt1Knxw-ho0601qSXGhonl3kYKrAwH6Lmxb43cb1P_86I5sFraL-9soqf8JWRTtnlhB7xP9pprP1vEHAb6j42QPwKg7GqV41fjGKADd5KUHFctTgvmHnkCc0UuQyXEwAgHEam4UDvwMF6Dwhh8FQaTjutAc2FBUL1jm5TPdjw>Updating our inactive account policies</a> (link em inglês)</li> </ul> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Atenciosamente,<br> Equipe de Contas do Google</p> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr> <td style=padding:40px> <table width=100% border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td><img src=https://www.gstatic.com/s2/oz/images/notifications/ppemail/gs_16q2_welcome_google_logo.png alt="" width=100 title=""></td> </tr> <tr> <td> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Este e-mail foi enviado para atualizar você sobre mudanças importantes na sua Conta do Google e nos serviços relacionados.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"> <span style="font-size:inherit; color:inherit; font-weight:inherit; line-height:inherit; font-family:inherit;">© 2023 Google LLC 1600 Amphitheatre Parkway, Mountain View, CA 94043</span> </p> <br> <br> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-40617798284098643552021-12-01T07:12:00.001-08:002021-12-01T07:12:08.036-08:00Learn more about our updated Terms of Service<table width=100% height=100% style="min-width: 348px;" border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 lang=en bgcolor=#FAFAFA role=presentation> <tr align=center> <td> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 bgcolor=#FAFAFA style=max-width:600px role=presentation> <tr> <td style=padding-top:20px;padding-bottom:20px;padding-left:40px;padding-right:40px> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td><img src=https://www.gstatic.com/images/branding/googlelogo/1x/googlelogo_color_112x36dp.png alt="" title=""></td> <td align=right style="text-align: end;"><a href=# style=text-decoration:none;color:#5f6368>jokesallthedays@gmail.com</a></td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr> <td style=padding-left:15px;padding-right:15px> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td bgcolor=#ffffff style="padding:35px 35px 10px 35px;border-radius:4px"> <table border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td align=center><img src=https://www.gstatic.com/s2/oz/images/notifications/ppemail/privacy_header_2x.png alt="" width=150 title="" role=presentation></td> </tr> <tr> <td> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">On January 5, 2022, we're making some changes to our Terms of Service. These changes won't affect the way you use Google services, but they'll make it easier for you to understand what to expect from Google — and what we expect from you — as you use our services.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">You can review the <a href=https://accounts.google.com/AccountChooser?Email=jokesallthedays@gmail.com&continue=https://policies.google.com/terms/update%3Futm_source%3Dtos2022-email%26utm_medium%3Demail>new terms here</a>. At a glance, here's what this update means for you:</p> <ul> <li style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><b>More clarity on what you can expect from Google and what we expect from you</b>: We're providing more examples to describe the mutually respectful conduct that we expect from all our users.</li> <li style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px"><b>Improved readability</b>: While our terms remain a legal document, we've done our best to make them easier to understand, including reorganizing some topics so that they're easier to find.</li> </ul> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">If you use Family Link to manage a Google Account for someone else, please take some time to talk to them about these changes.</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Thank you for using Google!</p> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr> <td style=padding:40px> <table width=100% border=0 cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 role=presentation> <tr> <td><img src=https://www.gstatic.com/s2/oz/images/notifications/ppemail/gs_16q2_welcome_google_logo.png alt="" width=100 title=""></td> </tr> <tr> <td> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">Google LLC, 1600 Amphitheatre Parkway, Mountain View, CA, 94043</p> <p style="margin:25px 0;font-family:Roboto, Helvetica Neue, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif;color:#5f6368;line-height:1.5;font-size:16px">You have received this email to update you about important changes to Google's Terms of Service.</p> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-46822623644285266882021-08-10T06:04:00.001-07:002021-08-10T06:04:28.663-07:00Reply me<div dir="ltr"><div dir="ltr"><div dir="ltr">Reply me</div><div dir="ltr"><br></div><div dir="ltr">Sarah Palma</div></div></div> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-34270805974796446322021-07-30T20:45:00.001-07:002021-07-30T20:45:10.826-07:00stayCOOlAndCOmfortableWithAEroCool.. 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<tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> <tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer><tfoot></tfoot><h5><footer></h5></footer> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-61510467914517215642020-08-06T03:06:00.001-07:002020-08-06T03:06:11.554-07:00International Conference Invitation!<div>Dear Friends and Colleagues,</div><div><br></div><div>On behalf of (EVAWI) End Violence Against Women International, I invite you to the up coming International conference, Taking place from September 13-18 2020 in The United States, and in Lome Togo, from September 21-25 2020.</div><div><br></div><div>Note that the Organizing Committee and donor sponsors will take the responsibility of all registered participants Visa processing, Air Tickets, Accommodation here in the USA, Also note that the total number of participants will be limited, and registrations will be dealt On the basis of first come, first served. Registration is still open.</div><div><br></div><div>Interested Delegates should contact secretary office via email: (evawi-secretary@gmx.us) for more information.</div><div><br></div><div>Mrs. Donna George,</div><div>Center for (EVAWI)</div><div>United State of America</div>Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-20289985247869167362020-02-23T14:00:00.001-08:002020-02-23T14:00:19.895-08:00Saiba mais sobre nossos Termos de Serviço atualizados<table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 align=center bgcolor=#fafafa> <tr> <td align=center valign=top> <!--[if (gte mso 9)|(IE)]> <table align="center" width="600" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td> <![endif]--> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 bgcolor=#fafafa style="max-width: 600px"> <!--Header starts--> <tr> <td align=center valign=top style="padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 20px;border-bottom:none;"> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0> <tr> <td align=left valign=middle style="padding-left: 30px;" class=mobblock> <table align=left cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0> <tr> <td align=left valign=middle> <img style="outline: none; text-decoration: none; display:block;" src=https://ssl.gstatic.com/s2/oz/images/notifications/ppemail/updated_google_logo_new.png width=98 border=0 alt=Google title=Google /> </td> </tr> </table> </td> <td align=right valign=middle style="padding-right: 25px;" class="txt email wid100 mobblock"> <table align=right cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 class=mobblock> <tr> <td class=txt align=right valign=middle style="font-family: Roboto, Arial, Open Sans, Helvetica, sans-serif;font-size: 10px;line-height: 16px;color: #5F6368;font-weight: 500"><a href=# style="text-decoration: none; color: #5F6368;">jokesallthedays@gmail.com</a> </td> </tr> </table> <td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <!--Header ends--> <!--Body starts--> <tr> <td align=center style="padding-left: 15px;padding-right: 15px;"> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0> <tr> <td bgcolor=#ffffff style="padding-left: 35px;padding-right: 35px;box-shadow: 0px 1px 2px 1px rgba(0,0,0,0.24); -webkit-box-shadow: 0px 1px 2px 1px rgba(0,0,0,0.24); -moz-box-shadow: 0px 1px 2px 1px rgba(0,0,0,0.24);border-radius: 4px"> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0> <tr> <td align=center valign=top style="padding-top: 35px"> <a href=# style="text-decoration: none; max-width: 150px; display: block;"> <img src=https://ssl.gstatic.com/s2/oz/images/notifications/ppemail/privacy_header_2x.png width=150 height=auto style="display: block; max-width: 150px; width: 100%; height: auto;"> </a> </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 35px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> Estamos melhorando nossos Termos de Serviço para que eles sejam mais fáceis de entender. As mudanças entrarão em vigor em 31 de março de 2020 e não terão nenhum impacto na maneira como você usa os serviços do Google. </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 25px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> Para mais detalhes, fornecemos um <a href=https://accounts.google.com/AccountChooser?Email=jokesallthedays@gmail.com&continue=https%3A%2F%2Fpolicies.google.com%2Fterms%2Fchanges%3Futm_source%3Dtos-email%26utm_medium%3Demail target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">resumo das principais mudanças</a> e respondemos às <a href=https://accounts.google.com/AccountChooser?Email=jokesallthedays@gmail.com&continue=https%3A%2F%2Fpolicies.google.com%2Fterms%2Fchanges%3Futm_source%3Dtos-email%26utm_medium%3Demail%23faq target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">Perguntas frequentes</a>. Na próxima vez que você acessar o Google, poderá revisar e aceitar os novos Termos. Em resumo, isto é o que essa atualização significa para você: </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 25px;"> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0 border=0> <tr> <td width=50 align=center valign=top style="font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> • </td> <td align=left valign=top style="font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> <strong>Entendimento facilitado:</strong> ainda que se trate de um documento jurídico, fizemos o melhor possível para facilitar o entendimento dos nossos Termos, incluindo links para informações úteis e fornecendo definições. </td> </tr> <tr> <td width=50 align=center valign=top style="padding-top: 15px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> • </td> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 15px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> <strong>Comunicação melhorada:</strong> explicamos claramente quando faremos mudanças nos nossos serviços, como adição e remoção de um recurso, e quando o acesso de um usuário será restringido ou encerrado. Além disso, faremos o possível para notificar você quando uma mudança impactar negativamente sua experiência nos nossos serviços. Também descrevemos como os pedidos de divulgação de dados são respondidos, por exemplo, solicitações de agências governamentais. </td> </tr> <tr> <td width=50 align=center valign=top style="padding-top: 15px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> • </td> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 15px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> <strong>Inclusão do Google Chrome, Chrome OS e Drive nos Termos:</strong> agora, nossos Termos melhorados se aplicam ao Google Chrome, Chrome OS e Drive. Esses serviços também possuem termos e políticas específicos para ajudar você a entender o que é exclusivo de cada um deles. </td> </tr> <tr> <td width=50 align=center valign=top style="padding-top: 15px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> • </td> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 15px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> <strong>Nenhuma mudança na nossa Política de Privacidade:</strong> não estamos mudando nada na <a href=https://accounts.google.com/AccountChooser?Email=jokesallthedays@gmail.com&continue=https%3A%2F%2Fpolicies.google.com%2Fprivacy%3Futm_source%3Dtos-email%26utm_medium%3Demail target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">Política de Privacidade do Google</a> e não mudamos a forma como tratamos suas informações. Você pode acessar sua <a href=https://myaccount.google.com target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">Conta do Google</a> sempre que quiser para revisar suas configurações de privacidade e gerenciar como seus dados são utilizados. </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 25px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> Se você for responsável por uma criança abaixo da <a href=https://support.google.com/accounts/answer/1350409 target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">idade necessária para gerenciar a própria Conta do Google</a> e você usar o <a href=https://families.google.com/familylink/ target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">Family Link</a> para gerenciar o uso dos serviços do Google, observe que ao aceitar os novos Termos, você também os aceita em nome dessa criança, então recomendamos conversar com ela sobre as mudanças. </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 25px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> Além disso, caso você não concorde com os novos Termos e o que é esperado de ambas as partes ao usar os serviços, veja mais informações sobre suas opções nas nossas <a href=https://accounts.google.com/AccountChooser?Email=jokesallthedays@gmail.com&continue=https%3A%2F%2Fpolicies.google.com%2Fterms%2Fchanges%3Futm_source%3Dtos-email%26utm_medium%3Demail%23faq target=_blank style="text-decoration: none; color: #4285f4;">Perguntas frequentes</a>. </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding-top: 25px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> Agradecemos por usar os serviços do Google. </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="padding: 0px 0 35px;font-family: Roboto Regular,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif;font-size: 14px;line-height: 24px;color: #5F6368"> <strong>Sua Equipe do Google</strong> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <!--body ends--> <tr> <td align=left style="padding-left: 15px;padding-right: 15px;padding-top: 30px" class=footer> <table width=100% cellspacing=0 cellpadding=0> <tr> <td style="padding-left: 35px;padding-right: 27px" class=footer> <img src=https://ssl.gstatic.com/s2/oz/images/notifications/ppemail/gs_16q2_welcome_google_logo.png alt=Google title=Google width=100 height=auto style="display: block;"> </td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left class=footer valign=top style="font-family:Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 12px; mso-line-height-rule: exactly; color:#707575; line-height:16px; padding-left: 35px;padding-right: 35px;padding-top:25px;"><a href=# style="text-decoration: none; color: #707575;">© 2020 Google LLC, 1600 Amphitheatre Parkway, Mountain View, CA, 94043</a></td> </tr> <tr> <td align=left valign=top style="font-family:Roboto,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 12px; mso-line-height-rule: exactly; color:#707575; line-height:16px; padding-left: 35px;padding-right: 35px;padding-top:15px;padding-bottom: 105px" class=footer>Este e-mail foi enviado para informar sobre mudanças importantes nos Termos de Serviço do Google.</td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> <!--[if (gte mso 9)|(IE)]> </td> </tr> </table> <![endif]--> </td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-44881652226032183782019-02-27T03:30:00.001-08:002019-02-27T03:30:07.047-08:00Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating<table width="550" cellspacing="5" cellpadding="10"> <tr> <td>This Joke of the Day is sent to you by <a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com">Funny Joke Rating</a>. <br><strong>Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to!</strong><br> Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/best-jokes/newest-jokes.html">15 Newest Jokes</a><br> <a href="http://twitter.com/FunnyJokeRating">@FunnyJokeRating on Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>A priest officiating at a senior's wedding. 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Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>America Offline<br /> [To the tune of "American Pie"]<br /> <br /> A long, long, time ago<br /> I can still remember when I dialed up their help desk lines.<br /> And I knew if I had the chance<br /> They could make my modem dance<br /> with chats and GIFs and silly pick-up lines.<br /> <br /> But Help Desk phone calls made me shiver<br /> with every busy they'd deliver.<br /> Bad news on the front page<br /> A 19-hour outrage.<br /> <br /> I can't remember if I cried<br /> when I realized that Steve Case had lied.<br /> But something touched me deep inside<br /> The day the service died.<br /> <br /> So bye bye to Amer'ca Online<br /> Drove my modem to a domain and it's working just fine.<br /> And good old geeks are cheering users offline<br /> Saying this'll be the day that they die.<br /> This'll be the day that they die.<br /> <br /> Did you write the book of TOS<br /> Will you send your password to PWD-BOSS<br /> If an IM tells you so.<br /> And will you believe the Motley Fool<br /> When he tells you that the service rules<br /> And can you teach me how to Web real slow?<br /> Well I know you sold the service short<br /> Cause I saw your quarterly report.<br /> <br /> Steve Case sold off his stock<br /> It fell just like a rock.<br /> <br /> It was a crazy, costly high-tech play<br /> As they slashed away at what subscribers pay<br /> And half their users went away<br /> the day the service died.<br /> <br /> So bye bye to Amer'ca Online<br /> Drove my modem to a domain and it's working just fine<br /> And good old geeks are cheering users offline<br /> Saying this'll be the day that they die.<br /> This'll be the day that they die.<br /> <br /> Well for two days we've been on our own<br /> And dial-ins click on a rolling phone<br /> But that's not how it used to be<br /> <br /> When the mogul came to Virginia court<br /> With an OS icon and a browser port<br /> And a desktop that looked like Apple III.<br /> <br /> And while Jim Clark was looking down<br /> The mogul stole his thorny crown<br /> <br /> The browser war was turned.<br /> Mozilla...was spurned.<br /> <br /> And while Steve left users out to bond<br /> With hosts unable to respond<br /> 6 million newbies all were conned<br /> the day the service died.<br /> <br /> So bye bye to Amer'ca Online<br /> Drove my modem to a domain and it's working just fine<br /> And good old geeks are cheering users offline<br /> Saying this'll be the day that they die.<br /> This'll be the day that they die.<br /> <br /> Da Chronic ducked their software guards<br /> And stole a million credit cards<br /> To use accounts he'd gotten free<br /> <br /> And so Steve Case went to the FBI<br /> and he told Boardwatch a little lie<br /> That hackers wanted child pornography<br /> But while Steve Case was looking down<br /> The hackers pulled his e-mail down<br /> <br /> They put it on the net.<br /> He can't be trusted yet!<br /> <br /> And while user cynicism climbs<br /> At sign-on ads and welcome rhymes<br /> They scan their e-mail for "Good Times"<br /> the day the service died.<br /> <br /> So bye bye to Amer'ca Online<br /> Drove my modem to a domain and it's working just fine<br /> And good old geeks are cheering users offline<br /> Saying this'll be the day that they die.<br /> This'll be the day that they die.<br /> <br /> Helter-skelter billing needs a melter<br /> The lawyers filed a class-action shelter<br /> <br /> Eight million in lawyer's fees.<br /> <br /> But it looks like some attorney jibe<br /> an hour if they resubscribe.<br /> To a service marketed for free<br /> <br /> Well I KNOW you're raking in the bucks<br /> Cause I'm reading alt.aol-sucks.<br /> <br /> "Until we bless the suit<br /> The settlement is moot."<br /> <br /> "If AOL treats you like the Borg<br /> Then visit aolsucks.org<br /> Before some router pulls the cord..."<br /> the day the service died.<br /> <br /> So bye bye to Amer'ca Online<br /> Drove my modem to a domain and it's working just fine<br /> And good old geeks are cheering users offline<br /> Saying this'll be the day that they die.<br /> This'll be the day that they die.<br /> <br /> Bill Razzouk, the head-to-be<br /> sold off his home in Tennessee<br /> And headed for a 4-month end.<br /> <br /> Was he sad or just incensed<br /> when Case offered him his thirty cents.<br /> Billing is the devil's only friend.<br /> <br /> But as I read him on the page<br /> My hands were clenched in fists of rage.<br /> <br /> No "Welcome" born in hell<br /> could ring that chatroom bell.<br /> <br /> And as chat freaks cried into the night<br /> CompuServe read their last rites.<br /> I saw Earthlink laughing with delight<br /> the day the service died.<br /> <br /> So bye bye to Amer'ca Online<br /> Drove my modem to a domain and it's working just fine<br /> And good old geeks are cheering users offline<br /> Saying this'll be the day that they die.<br /> This'll be the day that they die.<br /> <br /> I met a girl in Lobby 9<br /> And I asked her if she'd stay on-line.<br /> But she just frowned and looked away.<br /> <br /> And I went back to the Member Lounge<br /> To see what loyalty I could scrounge<br /> But Room Host said the members went away...<br /> <br /> And on the net the modems scream<br /> At faster speeds and data streams.<br /> <br /> And not a tear was spoken.<br /> The hourly fees were broken.<br /> <br /> And the three men that I hated most<br /> Ted, and Steve, and Razzouk's ghost<br /> They couldn't dial up the host<br /> The day the service died.</strong><br><br><p><a href="http://www.weight-loss247.com/weight-loss/weight-loss-tips/">Weight Loss Tips</a> || <a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=38712&u=172704&m=8239&urllink=&afftrack=" title="Funny T-Shirts" target="_blank">Funny T-Shirts</a></p> <p><a href="http://www.nickswoodgifts.com/">Handcrafted Wood Pens</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=53432&u=172704&m=9787&urllink=&afftrack=">Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid</a> || <a href="http://www.tshirthell.com/store/clicks.php?partner=student4ever">Insane T-Shirts!</a></p><p><a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com/webmasterinfo.html" title="Put Jokes on your Websites" target="_blank">Put Jokes on your Websites</a></p><p style='font-size: x-small; '>If you need to unsubscribe, click <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/unsubscribe.html">here</a></p></td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-16272953988654965122018-07-09T03:31:00.001-07:002018-07-09T03:31:08.047-07:00Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating<table width="550" cellspacing="5" cellpadding="10"> <tr> <td>This Joke of the Day is sent to you by <a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com">Funny Joke Rating</a>. <br><strong>Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to!</strong><br> Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/best-jokes/newest-jokes.html">15 Newest Jokes</a><br> <a href="http://twitter.com/FunnyJokeRating">@FunnyJokeRating on Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>Boudreaux went into the fish market to apply for a job.<br /> <br /> The boss thought to himself - I'm not hiring that lazy portagee, so he decided to set a test for Boudreaux hoping he wouldn't be able to answer the questions and he'd be able to refuse him the job without getting into an argument.<br /> <br /> The first question was, "Without using numbers, represent the number 9."<br /> <br /> Boudreaux says, "Dat's easy" and proceeds to draw three trees.<br /> <br /> The boss says, "What in the world is that?"<br /> <br /> Boudreaux says, "Tree 'n tree 'n tree makes nine."<br /> <br /> "Fair enough" says the boss. "Second questions, same rules, but represent 99".<br /> <br /> Boudreaux stares into space for a while, then makes a smudge on each tree.<br /> <br /> "Der ya go sir," he says.<br /> <br /> The boss scratches his head and asks, "How on earth do you get that to represent 99?"<br /> <br /> Boudreaux answers, "Each tree is dirty now, so it's - dirty tree 'n dirty tree 'n dirty tree - dat 99."<br /> <br /> The boss is getting worried he's going to have to hire Boudreaux so he says, "All right, question number 3. Same rules again, but this time represent the number 100."<br /> <br /> Boudreaux stares into space again, then he shouts, "I got it!" He makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Der ya go sir - 100."<br /> <br /> The boss looks at Boudreaux's attempt and thinks, "Ha! got him this time."<br /> <br /> He then tells Boudreaux, "Go on Boudreaux, you must be crazy if you think that represents a 100."<br /> <br /> Boudreaux leans forward and points to the little marks at the tree bases and says, "A little dog comes along and craps by each tree", so now ya got dirty tree an' a turd, dirty tree an' a turd, and dirty tree an 'a turd, which makes 100.<br /> <br /> When do I start my job?"</strong><br><br><p><a href="http://www.weight-loss247.com/weight-loss/weight-loss-tips/">Weight Loss Tips</a> || <a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=38712&u=172704&m=8239&urllink=&afftrack=" title="Funny T-Shirts" target="_blank">Funny T-Shirts</a></p> <p><a href="http://www.nickswoodgifts.com/">Handcrafted Wood Pens</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=53432&u=172704&m=9787&urllink=&afftrack=">Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid</a> || <a href="http://www.tshirthell.com/store/clicks.php?partner=student4ever">Insane T-Shirts!</a></p><p><a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com/webmasterinfo.html" title="Put Jokes on your Websites" target="_blank">Put Jokes on your Websites</a></p><p style='font-size: x-small; '>If you need to unsubscribe, click <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/unsubscribe.html">here</a></p></td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-58690779008090726722018-07-06T03:30:00.001-07:002018-07-06T03:30:07.849-07:00Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating<table width="550" cellspacing="5" cellpadding="10"> <tr> <td>This Joke of the Day is sent to you by <a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com">Funny Joke Rating</a>. <br><strong>Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to!</strong><br> Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/best-jokes/newest-jokes.html">15 Newest Jokes</a><br> <a href="http://twitter.com/FunnyJokeRating">@FunnyJokeRating on Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>Ways To Annoy Public Bathroom Friends<br /> <br /> 1.Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"<br /> <br /> 2. "Uh-oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that."<br /> <br /> 3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.<br /> <br /> 4. "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."<br /> <br /> 5. "Damn, this water is cold."<br /> <br /> 6. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place and sigh relaxingly.<br /> <br /> 7. "Now how did that get there?"<br /> <br /> 8. "Hummus. Reminds me of hummus."<br /> <br /> 9. Fill up a large flask with Mountian Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, "Whoa! Easy boy!!"<br /> <br /> 10. "Interesting....more sinkers than floaters"<br /> <br /> 11. Using a small squeeze tube, spread peaunt butter on a wad of toliet paper and drop under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, "Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"<br /> <br /> 12. "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!"<br /> <br /> 13. "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot"<br /> <br /> 14. "Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?"<br /> <br /> 15. Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.<br /> <br /> 16. Before you unroll toliet paper, conspicusly lay down your "Cross-Dressers Anonymous" newsletter on the floor visiable to the adjacent stall.<br /> <br /> 17. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"<br /> <br /> 18. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free."</strong><br><br><p><a href="http://www.nickswoodgifts.com/">Handmade Wood Gifts</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=53432&u=172704&m=9787&urllink=&afftrack=">Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid</a> || <a href="http://www.tshirthell.com/store/clicks.php?partner=student4ever">Outrageous T-Shirts!</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=38712&u=172704&m=8239&urllink=&afftrack=" title="Funny T-Shirts" target="_blank">Funny T-Shirts</a> || <a href="http://www.weight-loss247.com/weight-loss/">Weight Loss Program</a></p><p><a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com/webmasterinfo.html" title="Jokes for Websites" target="_blank">Jokes for Websites</a><p style='font-size: x-small; '>If you need to unsubscribe, click <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/unsubscribe.html">here</a></p></td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-90149528586333671182018-07-04T03:30:00.001-07:002018-07-04T03:30:08.083-07:00Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating<table width="550" cellspacing="5" cellpadding="10"> <tr> <td>This Joke of the Day is sent to you by <a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com">Funny Joke Rating</a>. <br><strong>Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to!</strong><br> Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/best-jokes/newest-jokes.html">15 Newest Jokes</a><br> <a href="http://twitter.com/FunnyJokeRating">@FunnyJokeRating on Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>A young blonde college girl came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!" she cried. <br /> <br /> "I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad. <br /> <br /> "You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble." <br /> <br /> "What are you talking about? That's one of the largest banks in the world," he said. "Surely there must be some mistake." <br /> <br /> "I don't think so," she sniffed. "They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, 'Insufficient Funds'."</strong><br><br><p><a href="http://www.nickswoodgifts.com/">Handmade Wood Gifts</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=53432&u=172704&m=9787&urllink=&afftrack=">Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid</a> || <a href="http://www.tshirthell.com/store/clicks.php?partner=student4ever">Outrageous T-Shirts!</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=38712&u=172704&m=8239&urllink=&afftrack=" title="Funny T-Shirts" target="_blank">Funny T-Shirts</a> || <a href="http://www.weight-loss247.com/weight-loss/">Weight Loss Program</a></p><p><a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com/webmasterinfo.html" title="Jokes for Websites" target="_blank">Jokes for Websites</a><p style='font-size: x-small; '>If you need to unsubscribe, click <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/unsubscribe.html">here</a></p></td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-19542133741057688072018-07-03T20:25:00.001-07:002018-07-03T20:25:10.340-07:00Trends And Styles<table style="min-width:320px;" width="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0" bgcolor="#eaeced"> <!-- fix for gmail --> <tr> <td class="hide"> <table width="600" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" style="width:600px !important;"> <tr> <td style="min-width:600px; font-size:0; line-height:0;"> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr> <td class="wrapper" style="padding:0 10px;"> <!-- module 1 --> <table data-module="module-1" data-thumb="http://www.petsafashion.com/thumbnails/01.png" width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-module" bgcolor="#999"> <table class="flexible" width="600" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td style="padding:0px 0 0px;"> <table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <th class="flex" width="113" align="left" style="padding:0;"> <table class="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td> <img src="http://www.petsafashion.com/images/logo1.png" style="width: 75px;float: left;"/> <h1 style="font-size: 35px;font-weight: 800;letter-spacing: 3px;color: #fff;float: left;">Pets a Fashion</h1> </td> </tr> </table> </th> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> <!-- module 2 --> <table data-module="module-2" data-thumb="http://www.petsafashion.com/thumbnails/02.png" width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-module" bgcolor="#999"> <table class="flexible" width="600" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td class="img-flex"><img src="http://www.petsafashion.com/images/img-01.jpg" style="vertical-align:top;" width="600" height="306" alt="" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-block" class="holder" style="padding:58px 60px 52px;" bgcolor="#f9f9f9"> <table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-color="title" data-size="size title" data-min="25" data-max="45" data-link-color="link title color" data-link-style="text-decoration:none; color:#292c34;" class="title" align="center" style="font:27px/38px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#292c34; padding:0 0 24px;"> Trends And Styles </td> </tr> <tr> <td data-color="text" data-size="size text" data-min="10" data-max="26" data-link-color="link text color" data-link-style="font-weight:bold; text-decoration:underline; color:#40aceb;" align="center" style="font: 14px/25px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#888; text-align: justify; padding:0 0 23px;"> The animals are part of the family; as another member, sometimes they are spoiled, and even treated as a people. Feelings toward them grow every day, life is responsible of including them in society, for this reason there is canine fashion.This trend has emerged specifically for dogs of different races that are part of the household, the household pets. Although it occurs more easily for smaller races, who better dog handling is achieved.Anthony Rubio is one of the most sought designers by those animal lovers in New York, a city fashion icon in the world. His passion was born by the canine fashion world. </td> </tr> <tr> <td style="padding:0 0 20px;"> <table width="134" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-button" data-size="size button" data-min="10" data-max="16" class="btn" align="center" style="font:12px/14px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#f8f9fb; text-transform:uppercase; mso-padding-alt:12px 10px 10px; border-radius:2px;" bgcolor="#7bb84f"> <a style="text-decoration:none; color:#f8f9fb; display:block; padding:12px 10px 10px;" href="http://nsqu.mjt.lu/lnk/AM4AAA6OuP4AAAAAAAAAAGqvK7oAAAAAAAgAAAAAAAmHMQBbPD4SG4R8JCkPT3mS3jbc87g5xwAJB38/1/Q9J8bLZZs5F7VRrsCTXVCA/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5wZXRzYWZhc2hpb24uY29tL3RyZW5kLnBocA">Learn More</a> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr><td height="28"></td></tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> <!-- module 3 --> <table data-module="module-3" data-thumb="http://www.petsafashion.com/thumbnails/03.png" width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-module" bgcolor="#999"> <table class="flexible" width="600" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td class="img-flex"><img src="http://www.petsafashion.com/images/img-02.jpg" style="vertical-align:top;" width="600" alt="" /></td> </tr> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-block" class="holder" style="padding:65px 60px 50px;" bgcolor="#f9f9f9"> <table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-color="title" data-size="size title" data-min="20" data-max="40" data-link-color="link title color" data-link-style="text-decoration:none; color:#292c34;" class="title" align="center" style="font:30px/33px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#292c34; padding:0 0 24px;"> Upcoming Pet Fashion Trends </td> </tr> <tr> <td data-color="text" data-size="size text" data-min="10" data-max="26" data-link-color="link text color" data-link-style="font-weight:bold; text-decoration:underline; color:#40aceb;" align="center" style="font:14px/29px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#888; padding:0 0 21px;text-align: justify;"> It's time to usher in a new revolution for our furry friends where their world becomes more colorful and stylish. Yes, we are talking about pet fashion which has become so HUGE globally. And now, globally, the multi-billion fashion industry for pets has grown almost in tandem with humans. In fact, you even have fashion maestros like Gucci who has jumped into the four-legged fashion fray and created a stylish line of backpacks for dogs. Not to forget the super chic New York Pet Fashion Week this had our wonder furry tails. </td> </tr> <tr> <td style="padding:0 0 20px;"> <table width="134" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-button" data-size="size button" data-min="10" data-max="16" class="btn" align="center" style="font:12px/14px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#f8f9fb; text-transform:uppercase; mso-padding-alt:12px 10px 10px; border-radius:2px;" bgcolor="#f5ba1c"> <a style="text-decoration:none; color:#f8f9fb; display:block; padding:12px 10px 10px;" href="http://nsqu.mjt.lu/lnk/AM4AAA6OuP4AAAAAAAAAAGqvK7oAAAAAAAgAAAAAAAmHMQBbPD4SG4R8JCkPT3mS3jbc87g5xwAJB38/2/KqD01d7uTRLLkY5iD9i1yQ/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5wZXRzYWZhc2hpb24uY29tL3VwY29taW5nLnBocA">Learn More</a> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <tr><td height="28"></td></tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> <!-- module 4 --> <table data-module="module-4" data-thumb="thumbnails/04.png" width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-module" bgcolor="#999"> <table class="flexible" width="600" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-block" class="holder" style="padding:50px 50px 15px;" bgcolor="#f9f9f9"> <table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-color="title" data-size="size title" data-min="20" data-max="40" data-link-color="link title color" data-link-style="text-decoration:none; color:#292c34;" class="title" align="center" style="font:30px/33px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#292c34; padding:0 0 23px;"> Secret Menu for Dogs </td> </tr> <tr> <td data-color="text" data-size="size text" data-min="10" data-max="26" data-link-color="link text color" data-link-style="font-weight:bold; text-decoration:underline; color:#40aceb;" align="center" style="font:14px/29px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#888;text-align: justify; padding:0 0 21px;"> For the secret menu obsessed, few national chains offer as many choices as Starbucks. There's the secret purple drink, the older news secret pink drink, and even a secret sneaky lid function. As far as customization goes, Starbucks pretty much rules the lot with a whopping reported 17,000 ways you can customize your drink and that's just for humans.Starbucks has quietly been serving up a whole other secret menu just for dogs. So far, it consists of one item, a top seller and crowd favorite: the Puppuccino. It is as adorable as it sounds, too. The drink comes in a dog-appropriate size an espresso cup and consists solely of whipped cream. </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> <table data-module="module-7" data-thumb="thumbnails/07.png" width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-bgcolor="bg-module" bgcolor="#999"> <table class="flexible" width="600" align="center" style="margin:0 auto;margin-top: 15px;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td class="footer" style="padding:0 0 10px;"> <table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr class="table-holder"> <th class="tfoot" width="400" align="left" style="vertical-align:top; padding:0;"> <table width="100%" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"> <tr> <td data-color="text" data-link-color="link text color" data-link-style="text-decoration:underline; color:#fff;" class="aligncenter" style="font:12px/16px Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; color:#fff; padding:0 0 10px;text-align: center;"> You have received this mailer from petsafashion because you agreed to receive special offers. In case you do not wish to receive such communications, <a style="text-decoration:underline; color:#e61b14;" href="http://nsqu.mjt.lu/lnk/AM4AAA6OuP4AAAAAAAAAAGqvK7oAAAAAAAgAAAAAAAmHMQBbPD4SG4R8JCkPT3mS3jbc87g5xwAJB38/3/ZD-zIYCehXg_GEW_zfqHJw/aHR0cDovL3d3dy5wZXRzYWZhc2hpb24uY29tL3Vuc3Vic2NyaWJlLnBocA">click here</a> to deactivate this service. </td> </tr> </table> </th> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> </table> </td> </tr> <!-- fix for gmail --> <tr> <td style="line-height:0;"><div style="display:none; white-space:nowrap; font:15px/1px courier;"> </div></td> </tr> </table> <br/><img src="http://nsqu.mjt.lu/oo/AM4AAA6OuP4AAAAAAAAAAGqvK7oAAAAAAAgAAAAAAAmHMQBbPD4SG4R8JCkPT3mS3jbc87g5xwAJB38/504fe796/e.gif" height="1" width="1" alt="" border="0" style="height:1px;width:1px;border:0;"/> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-54016708732865147692018-07-03T03:30:00.001-07:002018-07-03T03:30:14.310-07:00Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating<table width="550" cellspacing="5" cellpadding="10"> <tr> <td>This Joke of the Day is sent to you by <a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com">Funny Joke Rating</a>. <br><strong>Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to!</strong><br> Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/best-jokes/newest-jokes.html">15 Newest Jokes</a><br> <a href="http://twitter.com/FunnyJokeRating">@FunnyJokeRating on Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>Top Ten Surprises In The Dick Cheney Interview<br /> <br /> 10. Admitted he's the guy who popped a cap in Suge Knight<br /> <br /> 9. Sentenced himself to a week at Gitmo<br /> <br /> 8. He's engaged to Katie Holmes<br /> <br /> 7. Revealed list of the next ten old guys he plans to shoot<br /> <br /> 6. Pinned Brit Hume to the wall with a ninja throwing star<br /> <br /> 5. Chalked the whole thing up to 'roid rage<br /> <br /> 4. Spent most of the time talking about who's going to win "American Idol"<br /> <br /> 3. His clumsy attempt to pin the entire thing on Michael Brown<br /> <br /> 2. Claims it was all part of the plan to make Bush look smarter<br /> <br /> 1. Stunning admission: "The gun was loaded and so was I"</strong><br><br><p><a href="http://www.nickswoodgifts.com/">Handcrafted Wood Gifts</a> || <a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=53432&u=172704&m=9787&urllink=&afftrack=">Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid</a> || <a href="http://www.tshirthell.com/store/clicks.php?partner=student4ever">Insane T-Shirts!</a></p><p><a href="http://www.weight-loss247.com/">Weight Loss Plan</a> || <a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=38712&u=172704&m=8239&urllink=&afftrack=" title="Crazy T-Shirts" target="_blank">Crazy T-Shirts</a></p><p><a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com/webmasterinfo.html" title="Jokes for your Websites" target="_blank">Jokes for your Websites</a></p><p style='font-size: x-small; '>If you need to unsubscribe, click <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/unsubscribe.html">here</a></p></td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2578342412276671948.post-29719969243458223152018-07-02T03:30:00.001-07:002018-07-02T03:30:08.118-07:00Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating<table width="550" cellspacing="5" cellpadding="10"> <tr> <td>This Joke of the Day is sent to you by <a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com">Funny Joke Rating</a>. <br><strong>Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to!</strong><br> Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/best-jokes/newest-jokes.html">15 Newest Jokes</a><br> <a href="http://twitter.com/FunnyJokeRating">@FunnyJokeRating on Twitter</a><br> </td> </tr> <tr> <td> <strong>Little Johnny runs into the bathroom one day to find his mother taking a bath. He points at her bush and asks,"What's that Mommy?"<br /> <br /> A little embarrassed, she tells him "That is my sponge." Johnny is satisfied with that answer and goes back to playing with his toys.<br /> <br /> Some time later, Johnny catches his mother in the shower shortly after she has shaved her bush for bikini season. Johnny asks her, "Where is your sponge mommy?"<br /> <br /> Again embarrassed she tells him that she lost it but will probably find it soon. Johnny is a little worried and promises his mommy that he will help her find it. His mother says okay and goes back to showering.<br /> <br /> Soon, Johnny comes running back in and says that he has found his mother's sponge. "What do you mean you found my sponge? Where?"<br /> <br /> "The lady next door has it and she's washing Daddy's face with it!"</strong><br><br><p><a href="http://www.weight-loss247.com/weight-loss/weight-loss-tips/">Weight Loss Tips</a> || <a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=38712&u=172704&m=8239&urllink=&afftrack=" title="Funny T-Shirts" target="_blank">Funny T-Shirts</a></p> <p><a href="http://www.nickswoodgifts.com/">Handcrafted Wood Pens</a></p><p><a href="http://www.shareasale.com/r.cfm?b=53432&u=172704&m=9787&urllink=&afftrack=">Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid</a> || <a href="http://www.tshirthell.com/store/clicks.php?partner=student4ever">Insane T-Shirts!</a></p><p><a href="http://funny-joke-rating.com/webmasterinfo.html" title="Put Jokes on your Websites" target="_blank">Put Jokes on your Websites</a></p><p style='font-size: x-small; '>If you need to unsubscribe, click <a href="http://www.funny-joke-rating.com/unsubscribe.html">here</a></p></td> </tr> </table> Jokeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00148637458190900050noreply@blogger.com0