Sunday, October 11, 2009

Its All Humor

Its All Humor

Pope vs chinese

Posted: 11 Oct 2009 02:36 AM PDT

About a century or two ago, the Pope decided that all the
Chinese had to leave Italy. Naturally there was a big
uproar from the Chinese community.

So the Pope made a deal. He would have a religious debate
with a member of the Chinese community.

If the Chinese win, they could stay. If the Pope wins, the
Chinese would leave.

The Chinese realized that they had no other choice. So
they picked a middle-aged man named Ah Peh to represent
them. Ah Peh asked for one condition to be added to the
debate. "To make it more interesting", he said, "Neither
side would be allowed to talk". The Pope agreed.

The day of the great debate came. Ah Peh and the Pope sat
opposite each other for a full minute.

Then the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Ah
Peh looked back at him and raised one finger. The Pope
waved his fingers in a circle around his head. Ah Peh
pointed to the ground at where he sat.

The Pope pulled out a loaf and a glass of wine. Ah Peh
pull out an apple.
The Pope stood up and said: "I give up. This man is too
good. The Chinese can stay."

An hour later, the cardinals were all around The Pope
asking him what had happened.

The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent
the holy trinity.

He responded by holding up one finger to remind me that
there was still one God common to both our religions."

"Then I waved my finger around me to show him that God was
all around us."
He responded by pointing to the ground and showing that
God was also right here with us."

"I pulled out the wine and loaf to show that God absolves
all sin. He showed me an apple to remind us of the
original sin. He had an answer for everything.

What could I do?"

Meanwhile, the Chinese community had crowded around Ah
Peh.

"What happened?" they asked.
Well," said Ah Peh, "First he indicated to me that all
Chinese had 3 days to get out of here. I replied to him
f*#k off and not one of us is leaving."

"Then he pointed that this whole city would be cleared of
Chinese. I showed him that we are staying right here."

"Yes, and then???" asked the crowd.

"I don't know", said Ah Peh, "He took out his lunch, and

I took out mine!!!"

What are these, Dad ?

Posted: 10 Oct 2009 06:10 PM PDT

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son.

They happen to walk by the condom display, and the

Boy asks, 'What are these, Dad?

To which the man matter-of-factually replies, 'Those are called condoms, son.

Men use them to have safe sex.''Oh I see,' replied the boy.' Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school.

He looks over the display and picks up a Package of 3 and asks, 'Why are there 3 in this package?' The dad replies,

'Those are for high schoolboys, one for Friday, one for Saturday, and one For Sunday.'Cool' says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks,

'Then who are these for?' Those are for college men,' the dad answers,'TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday and TWO for Sunday.''WOW!' exclaimed the boy, 'then who uses THESE?' he asks, picking up a 12 Pack.

With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied

Those are for Married men. One for January, one for February, one for March.........

Posted by Jokes at 1:04 PM

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