|
| From the Jokester | Have a Look at This Joke & Matching Picture at www.thejokester.net |
| Help the Jokester’s eMail List Grow, | ||
| | ||
| Great News Tracy, the newlywed wife said to her husband, Bill, when he returned from work, "I have great news for you. Pretty soon we're going to be three in this house instead of two." Bill started glowing with happiness and kissing his wife said, "Oh darling, I'm the happiest man in the world." But then Tracy said, "I'm glad that you feel this way because tomorrow morning my mother moves in with us." Hotel Bill A couple leaving a Paris hotel were given a bill for $400. The man protested to the manager who reminded him that he had a room plus bath. "But I didn't take a bath," said the man. "I can't help that, it was there for you," replied the manager. The unhappy man wrote something on a paper and presented the manager with a bill for $100. "What's that for?" cried the manager. "For kissing my wife." "But I never touched your wife," objected the manager, angrily. "Can't help it," said the other, "she was there for you." After a week in a Marseille hotel, he was handed a huge bill. Remembering Paris, our hero called for the manager and said: "M'sieur, you owe me $300." "For what?" asked the manager. "For making love to my charming wife, Ethel, that's what." The manager suddenly became red-faced and nervous as he replied in a low voice: "Sir, not so loud, please. If you will come into my office, I will write you a check right away." One Kiss One day this fellow noticed that a new couple had moved into the house next door. He was also quick to notice that the woman liked to sunbathe in the back yard, usually in a skimpy bikini that showed off a magnificent pair of breasts. He made it a point to water and trims his lawn as much as possible, hoping for yet another look. Finally, he could stand it no more. Walking to the front door of the new neighbor's house, he knocked and waited. The husband, a large, burly man, opened the door. "Excuse me", our man stammered, "but I couldn't help noticing how beautiful your wife is." "Yeah? So?" his hulking neighbor replied. "Well, in particular, I am really struck by how beautiful her breasts are. I would gladly pay you ten thousand dollars if I could kiss those breasts." The burly gorilla is about to deck our poor guy when his wife appears and stops him. She pulls him inside and they discuss the offer for a few moments. Finally, they return and ask our friend to step inside. "OK," the husband says gruffly, "for ten thousand dollars you can kiss my wife's tits." At this the wife unbuttons her blouse, and the twin objects of desire hang free at last. Our man takes one in each hand, and proceeds to rub his face against them in total ecstasy. This goes on for several minutes, until the husband gets annoyed. "Well, come on already, kiss 'em!" he growls. "I can't" replies our awe-struck hero, still nuzzling away. "Why not?" demands the husband, getting really angry now. "I don't have ten thousand dollars!" Marriage BEFORE MARRIAGE: Husband - Aaah! ...At last! I can hardly wait! Wife - Do you want me to leave? Husband - No! Don't even think about it. Wife - Do you love me? Husband - Of course! Always have and always will! Wife - Have you ever cheated on me? Husband - No! Why are you even asking? Wife - Will you kiss me? Husband - Every chance I get! Wife - Will you hit me? Husband - Hell no! Are you crazy?! Wife - Can I trust you? Husband - Yes. Wife - Darling! AFTER MARRIAGE: read from bottom to top. | ||
| Feel Free To Submit Some Of Your Favorite Jokes | ||
| See This Joke & Matching Picture at: www.TheJokester.net | ||
| Help My Joke List Grow: Invite friends and family at If you got this email from a friend, | ||
All the Best: Your Often Misguided Humorist and Joke Moderator, The Jokester {aka Dan the Man}.
Subscription Information:
ü Jokes are customarily sent 3 - 5 times per week covering a range of hopefully (?) humorous subjects!
ü Just remember, don't blame the messenger: I only send the jokes, I don't write them.
ü To unsubscribe see the instructions below or send me an email (be sure to tell me which group you joined).
ü But Wait! Before you unsubscribe, stop and think about it. Have you given the jokes enough time? The occasional bad joke is to be expected. Hang in there, maybe the next joke will make your day!?!?
From Your Often Misguided Humorist and Joke Moderator, The Jokester {aka Dan the Man}: Jokester@TheJokester.net
--~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "The Jokester" group.
To post to this group, send email to TheJokester@googlegroups.com
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to TheJokester+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/TheJokester?hl=en
-~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
0 comments:
Post a Comment