Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating

This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! 15 Newest Jokes @FunnyJokeRating on Twitter

Questions for the ages: If the earth is travelling at 65,000 miles per hour, why doesn't it affect our hair? If sniffing gas makes you high, why don't more people have thier noses stuck up other people's asses? Why does cargo get sent by ship, and shipments sent by car? Why don't people with magnetic personalities set off metal detectors? Does yellow snow taste banana flavoured? 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Is it just coincidence? If x=10, and y=X^2 + 10z^4, how far past the expiration date can you keep milk? If sour cream really is cream that has gone sour, why don't people just buy cream and keep it in their fridge for four months? When will Porsche build a car that everyone can afford? If John Tesh fell over in a forest, would anybody care? If you could go back in time and tell yourself one thing, would it to be not to buy those socks you just bought? Why are so many people stuck on stucco? Handmade Wood Gifts Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid  ||  Outrageous T-Shirts! Funny T-Shirts || Weight Loss Program Jokes for Websites If you need to unsubscribe, click here

Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating

This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! 15 Newest Jokes @FunnyJokeRating on Twitter

There were three little pigs that went to a restaurant for dinner. The waiter came to the table and asked if they would like something to drink. The first piggy said, "I would like a Dr. Pepper." The second piggy said, "I would like a glass of tea." The third piggy said, "I would like a glass of water." When the waiter brought the drinks, he asked if they were ready to order. The first piggy said, "I would like a Hamburger." The second piggy said, "I would like a Steak." The third piggy said, "I would like a glass of water." When the piggies were finished eating, the waiter asked if they would like some dessert. The first piggy said, "I would like a hot fudge sundae." The second piggy said, "I would like a banana split." The third piggy said, "I would like a glass of water." When the piggies were finished with dessert, the waiter brought their check. Before he left the table, he asked the third little piggy why he only ordered water. The third piggy said, "Well, someone has to go 'Wee wee wee all the way home'." Weight Loss Tips  ||  Funny T-Shirts Handcrafted Wood Pens Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid  ||  Insane T-Shirts! Put Jokes on your Websites If you need to unsubscribe, click here

Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating

This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! 15 Newest Jokes @FunnyJokeRating on Twitter

Welles and Link were lost in the desert and hadn't eaten in weeks. Suddenly they stumbled on a dead coyote covered with maggots. Welles, at the point of starvation, couldn't control himself. He threw himself on the rotting animal and began eating it. Ten minutes later, he threw up all over the place. At that moment, Link began eating what his friend had just vomited. He stopped for a moment and said, "I knew if I waited long enough I'd have a hot meal!" Handcrafted Wood Gifts  ||  Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid  ||  Insane T-Shirts! Weight Loss Plan  ||  Crazy T-Shirts Jokes for your Websites If you need to unsubscribe, click here

Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating

This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! 15 Newest Jokes @FunnyJokeRating on Twitter

What a rip-off. I went into our local bookstore and saw this huge display with a sign saying "Newly translated from the original French: 37 mating positions." Noticing that the books were already wrapped in plain brown paper, I just hadda buy one. Once safely at home I opened it, out of sight of my wife, and found that I had just purchased an expensive book about Chess. Handcrafted Wood Gifts  ||  Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid  ||  Insane T-Shirts! Weight Loss Plan  ||  Crazy T-Shirts Jokes for your Websites If you need to unsubscribe, click here

Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating

This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! 15 Newest Jokes @FunnyJokeRating on Twitter

A woman goes into a tattoo parlor and says "I want a tattoo of ELVIS on the inside of my right thigh." The artist says "No Problem, get undressed and lay on the table." When he is done, he says "So, what do you think?" She replies," That doesn't look like ELVIS at all! I want you to do it over on the inside of my left thigh" The artist agrees and when finished, asks for her to appraise his work. "DAMMIT,..not only does that not look like ELVIS, it looks just like the tattoo on my other thigh!" Calmly the artist asks her if she would like a second opinion and he walks outside and grabs the first person he sees...a drunk. He brings him back inside, shoves his face between her legs and says, "I want you to look at these two tattoos and tell me who it is?" The drunk looks at one tattoo, then the other, and exclaims, "Well...I don't know about the twins, but that's WILLIE NELSON in the middle!" Weight Loss Tips  ||  Funny T-Shirts Handcrafted Wood Pens Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid  ||  Insane T-Shirts! Put Jokes on your Websites If you need to unsubscribe, click here

Your Joke of the Day from Funny Joke Rating

This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! 15 Newest Jokes @FunnyJokeRating on Twitter

There was this guy named John that went to heaven. He looked around and saw millions of clocks, some were slow and some were fast. He went to God to ask a question. "What's the deal with all these clocks?" John asked. "Well," said God, "these clocks tell how much a person masturbates." "Well, where's my clock?" asked John. "It's in the office," replied God. "We use it as a fan." Handcrafted Wood Gifts  ||  Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid  ||  Insane T-Shirts! Weight Loss Plan  ||  Crazy T-Shirts Jokes for your Websites If you need to unsubscribe, click here