Funny Jokes Blog |
| Posted: 29 Jun 2011 11:29 PM PDT  |
| Posted: 29 Jun 2011 11:30 PM PDT  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Funny Jokes Blog To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| A young single guy is on a cruise ship, having the time of his life. On the second day of the cruise, the ship slams into an iceberg and begins to sink. Passengers around him are screaming, flailing, and drowning but our guy manages to grab on to a piece of driftwood and, using every last ounce of strength, swims a few miles through the shark-infested sea to a remote island. Sprawled on the shore nearly passed out from exhaustion, he turns his head and sees a woman lying near him, unconscious, barely breathing. She's also managed to wash up on shore from the sinking ship. He makes his way to her, and with some mouth-to-mouth assistance he manages to get her breathing again. She looks up at him, wide-eyed and grateful and says, "My God, you saved my life!" He suddenly realizes the woman is Cindy Crawford! Days and weeks go by. Cindy and our guy are living on the island together. They've set up a hut, there's fruit on the trees, and they're in heaven. Cindy's fallen madly in love with our man, and they're making passionate love morning, noon and night. Alas, one day she notices he's looking kind of glum. "What's the matter, sweetheart?" she asks, "We have a wonderful life together, I'm in love with you. Is there something wrong? Is there anything I can do?" He says, "Actually, Cindy, there is. Would you mind, putting on my shirt?" "Sure," she says, "if it will help." He takes off his shirt and she puts it on. "Now would you put on my pants?" he asks. "Sure, honey, if it's really going to make you feel better," she says. "Okay, would you put on my hat now, and draw a little mustache on your face?" he asks. "Whatever you want, sweetie," she says, and does. Then he says, "Now, would you start walking around the edge of the island?" She starts walking around the perimeter of the island. He sets off in the other direction. They meet up half way around the island a few minutes later. He rushes up to her, grabs her by the shoulders, and says, "Dude! You'll never believe who I'm sleeping with!" On-line Dating || Funny T-Shirts |
Its All Humor |
| Steal a Hacker's Computer think twice Posted: 27 Jun 2011 07:12 PM PDT It goes without saying that you should never mess with a hacker. Stealing a computer hacker's computer would be like stealing her children. Want to know what happens when a hacker gets his computer stolen? Watch this entertaining story, which was transmitted at the DEF CON. Go directly to 3:15, and the video jump to the beginning of the story.  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees $10 and a note in his mouth, reading: "10 lamb chops, please." Amazed, he takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth, and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop. The dog checks the timetable and sits on the bench. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck. As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off. The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the stoop. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door. He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door. A big guy opens it and starts cursing and pummeling the dog. The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What the hell are you doing? This dog's a genius!" The owner responds, "Genius? It's the second time this week he's forgotten his key!" On-line Dating || Funny T-Shirts |
Its All Humor |
| Posted: 26 Jun 2011 07:31 PM PDT Five surgeons from major cities discuss, who makes the best patients to operate. The first surgeon, from Manchester, said: "I like to see accountants on my operating table, because when you open them, everything inside is numbered " The second surgeon, from Birmingham, said, "Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded. " The third surgeon, from Edinburgh, said: "No, I really think librarians are the best, everything inside them is in alphabetical order. The fourth surgeon, from Belfast, chimes in: "You know, I like construction workers ... those guys always understand when you have a few extra parts. " But the fifth surgeon, from London, close all when he observed: "You are all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate. No guts, no heart, no balls, no brains and no spine and head and a s s are interchangeable. "...  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| 3 men are in a bar with their pints talking to the barman, and after a while the barman offers to take them to his flat to watch the cup final on TV, so out of courtesy the men agree. When they get there they are almost overpowered by the state of the flat, there is cat shit all over the floor and litter and moldy milk bottles and the overpowering stench of cat piss, and this puzzled them because he didn't own a cat, but he had his window open so every cat in town could come in there. One of the men decided to ask "Why do you keep the window open?*, he replied "To get rid of the smell of cats piss!" On-line Dating || Funny T-Shirts |
Its All Humor |
| Things a dad would not say to a son Posted: 23 Jun 2011 07:14 PM PDT 1. Well, how 'bout that?...I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop and ask for directions. 2. You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for unchaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun? 3. Here's a credit card and the keys to my new car-GO CRAZY. 4. What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating not good enough for you, son? 5. Your mother and I are going away for the weekend...you might want to consider throwing a party. 6. Well, I don't know what's wrong with your car. Probably one of those doo-hickey thingies-you know-that makes it run or something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks. 7. No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an earring now quit your belly-aching, and let's go to the mall. 8. What ya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for you to spend. 9. Father's Day? Aaahh-don't worry about that-it's no big deal.  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| This blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 1.5 gallons?" The blonde said, "I want 15 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath." The milkman asked, "Pasteurized?" The blonde said, "No, just up to my tits." Handcrafted Wood Gifts || Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid || Insane T-Shirts! |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| An old Italian Mafia Don was dying and he called his grandson to his bed. "Grandson, I wannna you lisin to me. I want for you to take my chrome plated 38 revolver so you will always remember me." "But Grandpa, I really don’t like guns---how about you leaving me your Rolex watch instead?" "You lisina to me! Someday you goina be runna the business, you goina have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big home, and maybe a couple of bambino. Someday, you goina coma home and maybe finda your wife in bed with another man. What do you do then? Point to your watch and say TIMES UP?" On-line Dating || Funny T-Shirts |
Its All Humor |
| Posted: 21 Jun 2011 07:00 PM PDT An English lady visited Switzerland and had difficulty finding a room, so I asked the local teacher to help her. After a quarter had been found satisfactory, she returned home and some packing. Suddenly, it occurred to him that he had not noticed a WC (in England, the bathroom is called Water Closet), so the teacher wrote on the toilet The teacher, without knowing the meaning, asked the parish priest and together they decided it must mean "Wayside Chapel". He wrote the following letter: Dear Madam, It is a pleasure to inform you that there is a WC just 9 miles from his home in the middle of a pine forest. It can accommodate 220 people and is open on Thursdays and Sundays. This is an unfortunate situation if you are in the habit of going regularly. You will undoubtedly be glad to know that some people bring their lunch and make a day of it. I recommend especially on Thursdays, because then there is an organ accompaniment. The acoustics of W.C. are excellent, even the most delicate sounds can be heard. My son married in W.C. and there was such a rush for seats that 10 people had to sit in the seat. The look on their faces were very interesting. My wife is sick, but dedicated. She does not go regularly, and that has not gone nearly a year. I will be happy to reserve a seat on the W.C. so, in what will be seen and heard by all. Hope that I have been of some help. Sincerely, The teacher  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| A gay man goes to the doctor and complains that his husband is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives him a pill, but warns him it is still experimental and tells his to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner. So, that night at dinner, he does. About a week later he's back at the doctor. he says, "Doc, the pill worked great!! I put it in the potatoes like you said! It wasn't five minutes and he jumps up, rakes all the food and dishes on the floor, grabs me, rips all my clothes off and ravages me right there on the table!" The doctor says, "I'm sorry, we didn't realize the pill was that strong. The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages." "Naah... ", he says, "that's okay. We aren't going back to that Restaurant anyway." Handcrafted Wood Gifts || Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid || Insane T-Shirts! |
Funny Jokes Blog |
| Posted: 21 Jun 2011 02:58 AM PDT A man walked into a public toilet where he found two cubicles, of which one was already occupied. So he entered the other one, closed the door, dropped his trousers and sat down. A voice came from the cubicle next to him: "Hello mate, how are you going?" He thought it a bit strange but not wanting to be rude he replied "Yeah, not too bad thanks." After a short pause, he heard the voice again "So, what are you up to mate?" Unsure of what to say, he reluctantly replied "Umm, just having a quick poo... How about yourself?" He then heard the voice for the third time ...... "Sorry mate, I'll have to call you back . I've got some moron in the loo next to me answering everything I say."  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Funny Jokes Blog To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| One Friday afternoon, Steve's boss told him that he had to work overtime that day. That was okay with Steve except that he had no way of letting his wife know he'd be coming home late since they had just moved into a new house and it didn't have a phone yet. "Since I'm passing that way, I'll tell her," the boss volunteered. A few hours later, the boss arrived at Steve's house and rang the doorbell. Steve's wife came to the door wearing a see-through negligee. The boss couldn't take his eyes off her body. "Yes?" she said. "Hi, I'm Steve's boss," the boss said. "He'll be working overtime tonight and asked me to tell you he'll be home late." "Thank you," she replied. "Now, how about you and me going upstairs for some hot sex!" Steve's wife felt her cheeks flush to an angry red. "How dare you!!!!" The boss shrugged. "Supposing I give you fifty dollars?" "Absolutely not! Why, I never heard such nerve..." "One hundred dollars, then?" "Uh...hell, no!" "Okay, how about three hundred dollars then?" "Uhhh, I don't think that would be right, do you?" The boss purred, "Listen, honey, Steve isn't gonna know. It's an easy way to make three hundred dollars and we'll just spend a little time together." So the wife nodded, took him by the hand, and led him upstairs to the bedroom where they had sex for an hour. That night, Steve came home and asked, "Did my boss come by and tell you I'd be late?" "Yes, Steve," the wife innocently said, "he did stop by for a few seconds." "Good," said Steve. "Then he gave you my salary?" Handcrafted Wood Gifts || Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid || Insane T-Shirts! |
Funny Jokes Blog |
| Posted: 19 Jun 2011 11:05 PM PDT * Lerman's Law of Technology: Every technical problem can be overcome if given enough time & money. Corollary: You are never given enough time or money. * Murphy's Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to pick up five items at the store and then you add one more as an afterthought, he will forget two of the first five. * Law of Search: The first place to look for anything is the last place you would expect to find it. Corollary: It will not be in the last place you expect to find it. * Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation: The less important you are to the company, the more your tardiness or absence is noticed. * The Salary Axiom: The pay raise is just large enough to increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect on your take-home pay. * Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything except what happens. * First Law of Living: As soon as you start doing what you always wanted to be do, you'll want to do something else. * Weiner's Law of Libraries: There are no answers, only cross references. * Isaac's Rule of Staleness: Any food that starts out hard will soften when stale and any food that starts out soft will harden when stale * Kenny's Law of Auto Repair: The part requiring the most consistent repair or replacement will be housed in the most inaccessible location. * The Grocery Bag Law: The chocolate that you planned to eat on the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the grocery bag. * Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you will not be noticed. When you leave work early, you will meet your boss in the parking lot. * Quile's Consultation Law: The job that pays the most will be offered when there is no time to deliver the services.  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Funny Jokes Blog To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| A husband was in BIG trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary. "Tomorrow," his wife angrily told him, "there had better be something in our driveway that goes from zero to 200 in two seconds flat!" The next morning, the wife looked outside and saw a small package in the driveway. She brought it inside, opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Funeral services for her husband have been set for Saturday. Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid || Outrageous T-Shirts! |
|
|
| |
| ||
|
|
| |
| Where did the Jokester go?
How long can a sabbatical last?
Well – a sabbatical turned into an employment "situation"
The boss created enough smoke and gossip to fool Senior Management to fire me! Then, in the same breath- he immediately hired me back to stay for at least 3 months to train my replacement. What choice did I have? I was caught completely off guard and completely unprepared for being stabbed in the back. So I stayed, made the company more money, trained staff on how to do the job and kept the clients happy.
The trouble was, none of the existing staff would work for the guy (as they saw how I had been mis-treated for so long). So he had to look outside the company for new 'talent'? Two months later he finally found someone to replace me. But to my great delight, I found a new job – I think the boss was more than a little surprised that I 1) could find a job that fast ) and 2) went to the trouble to read the fine print of my letter of termination which said, if either party elects to no longer work for the company, then the termination is immediate. I elected to leave cold turkey! And he was high and dry for training my replacement.
The sad thing is that I worked for that company for 8.5 years and not one of the exalted Top Management asked why was Dan the Man, let go. Or if they did ask, they did not look past the fake smoke to see a set-up, plain as day.
But onwards and forwards – I have a new job within my field of knowledge and expertise, but every day is a new challenge and opportunity to broaden my horizons.
The good news is I no longer have to work for the worst boss I ever had.
The bad news is that I still have no time to send jokes.
So hang in there – the jokes will eventually follow!
All the best – have a great summer
Dan the Man aka The Jokester!
|
| |
Its All Humor |
| Posted: 18 Jun 2011 08:45 AM PDT A widowed Jewish lady, still in good shape, was sunbathing on a most deserted beach at Boca Raton Florida She look up and noticed that a man her age, also in good shape, had walked up, placed his blanket on the sand near hers and began reading a book. Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "How are you today?" "Fine, thank you," he responded, and turned back to his book. "I love the beach. Do you come here often?" she asked. "First time since my wife passed away 2 years ago," he replied and turned back to his book. "I'm sorry to hear that. My husband passed away three years ago and it is very lonely, she countered. "Do you live around here?" She asked. "Yes, I live over in Cape Coral ," he answered , and again he resumed reading. Trying to find a topic of common interest, she persisted," Do you like pussy cats?" With that, the man dropped his book, came over to her blanket, tore off her swimsuit and gave her the most passionate lovemaking of her life. When the cloud of sand began to settle, she gasped and asked the man, "How did you know that was what I wanted?" The man replied, "How did you know my name was Karz?"  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
OFFICE OF THE SENATE HOUSE
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
COMMITTEE ON FOREIGN PAYMENT
(RESOLUTION PANEL ON CONTRACT PAYMENT)
IKOYI-LAGOS NIGERIA
Our Ref: FGN /SNT/STB
This is to officially inform you that (ATM Card Number 5951390123652671) has
been accredited with your favor.Your Personal Identification Number is 822.The
ATM Card Value is $6.8MILLIONUSD. You are advised to contact my Secetary for
delivery as soon as possible:
Mr. Laura C. Carlson
Email: atmcardawardremittancedep0@yahoo.com.hk
with the following informations
FULL NAME:
DELIVERY ADDRESS:
PHONE NUMBER:
COUNTRY:
OCCUPATION:
SEX:
AGE:
EMAIL:
KINDEST REGARDS,
(SEN).DAVID MARK
SENATE PRESIDENT.
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| First grade class comes in from recess. Teacher asks Alice: "What did you do at recess?" Alice says, "I played in the sand box." Teacher says "That's good. Go to the blackboard, and if you can write 'sand' correctly, I'll give you a fresh-baked cookie." She does and gets a cookie. Teacher asks Billy what he did at recess. Billy says, "I played with Alice in sand box." Teacher says, "Good. If you write 'Box' correctly on blackboard, I'll give you a fresh baked cookie." Billy does, and gets a cookie. Teacher then asks Mustaffa Machmoud what he did at recess. He says, "I tried to play with Alice and Billy, but they threw rocks at me." Teacher says, "Threw rocks at you? That sounds like blatant racial discrimination. If you can go the blackboard and write 'blatant racial discrimination' I'll give you a cookie." On-line Dating || Funny T-Shirts |
The removal of the email address:
jokesallthedays@gmail.com
from the mailing list:
FuntOOsh.com
is complete.
You may wish to save this email message for future reference.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date of this removal: Fri Jun 17 02:31:02 2011
You may automatically re-subscribe to this list at any time by
visiting the following URL:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/s/jday/jokesallthedays/gmail.com/>
If the above URL is inoperable, make sure that you have copied the
entire address. Some mail readers will wrap a long URL and thus break
this automatic unsubscribe mechanism.
You may also change your subscription by visiting this list's main screen:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/list/jday>
If you're still having trouble, please contact the list owner at:
<mailto:mailinglist@funtoosh.com>
The following physical address is associated with this mailing list:
Funtoosh.com Hyderabad, India
- <mailto:mailinglist@funtoosh.com>
Its All Humor |
| Posted: 16 Jun 2011 03:26 AM PDT Ninja Defuse on Derail Ninja Defuse on Estate Ninja Defuse on Sub Base Go and try and get one of these for each map and make a montage  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| Two men, moderately proficient in Yiddish, were lamenting the fact that there are Yiddish expressions that you can't translate well into English. Furthermore, there were some English words that cannot not be easily translated into Yiddish. One man said to the other, I have difficulty finding a Yiddish word that adequately conveys the concept of of the English word "disappointed." His friend said, "My mother speaks only Yiddish. I'll find out from her how to say disappointed in Yiddish." The man goes to his mother's house and say's "Mama, you know that I always come over for Shabbos dinner every Friday night. How would you feel if, one Friday, I called and said I wouldn't be coming over for Shabbos?" The mother replied, "Oy! Ich'll zein zayer disappointed!" Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid || Outrageous T-Shirts! |
This message has been sent to you as the final step to confirm your
email *removal* for the following list:
FuntOOsh.com
To confirm this unsubscription, please follow the URL below:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/u/jday/jokesallthedays/gmail.com/13458548/>
(Click the URL above, or copy and paste the URL into your browser.
Doing so will remove you to this list.)
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
The following is the description given for this list:
Start your day with a laugh get one hilarious joke daily (Monday - Friday) in your email from Funtoosh.com Joke-a-day email service - Laughter is guaranteed!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
This double opt-out confirmation email was sent to protect the privacy
of the owner of this email address.
Furthermore, the following privacy policy is associated with this list:
We do not share your email address or any other info with third parties, your email address is safe with us, for more info please refer to our Privacy http://www.funtoosh.com/policy.htm
Please read and understand this privacy policy.
If you did not ask to be removed from this particular list, please
do not visit the confirmation URL above. The confirmation for removal
will not go through and no other action on your part will be needed.
You can contact us via http://www.funtoosh.com/comments_sugg.htm
Funtoosh Team
http://www.funtoosh.com
The subscription of the email address jokesallthedays@gmail.com to the mailing list Funtoosh.com Joke-a-day is complete.
Please note that this Ezine - Funtoosh.com Joke-a-day is sent 3 times in a week, Monday's, Wednesday's and Fridays thanks for subscribing your subscription will start in a day or two!
NOTE:- If you are using email address from yahoo / hotmail / rediffmail / gmail sometimes the subscriptions emails can delivered into the bulk folder / junk folder, please note that the emails will be delivered from mailinglist@funtoosh.com emails address so make sure that that mailinglist@funtoosh.com is in your address book or whitelist.
For More info http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/subscriber_help/jday/
Please save this email message for future reference.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date of this subscription: Thu Jun 16 02:19:27 2011
You may automatically unsubscribe from this list at any time by
visiting the following URL:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/u/jday/jokesallthedays/gmail.com/>
If the above URL is inoperable, make sure that you have copied the
entire address. Some mail readers will wrap a long URL and thus break
this automatic unsubscribe mechanism.
You may also change your subscription by visiting this list's main screen:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/list/jday>
If you're still having trouble, please contact us via http://www.funtoosh.com/comments_sugg.htm
Funtoosh Team
http://www.funtoosh.com
The removal of the email address:
jokesallthedays@gmail.com
from the mailing list:
FuntOOsh.com
is complete.
You may wish to save this email message for future reference.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Date of this removal: Thu Jun 16 02:19:23 2011
You may automatically re-subscribe to this list at any time by
visiting the following URL:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/s/jday/jokesallthedays/gmail.com/>
If the above URL is inoperable, make sure that you have copied the
entire address. Some mail readers will wrap a long URL and thus break
this automatic unsubscribe mechanism.
You may also change your subscription by visiting this list's main screen:
<http://www.funtoosh.com/cgi-bin/ezines/mail.cgi/list/jday>
If you're still having trouble, please contact the list owner at:
<mailto:mailinglist@funtoosh.com>
The following physical address is associated with this mailing list:
Funtoosh.com Hyderabad, India
- <mailto:mailinglist@funtoosh.com>
| This Joke of the Day is sent to you by Funny Joke Rating. Forward it to your friends so they can laugh to! Check out our newest jokes - new jokes are added constantly! Funny Joke Rating New Jokes. |
| He'd been playing for twenty years and he'd never managed it - the ultimate goal, a hole in one. As he was chipping away in a sandtrap one day and moving nothing but sand, he voiced the thought. "I'd give anything," he said, "anything to get a hole in one." "Anything?" came a voice from behind and he turned to see a grinning, red-clad figure with neatly polished horns and sharpened tail. "What did you have in mind?" the golfer enquired. "Well would you give up half your sex life.'" "Yes, Yes I would." "It's a deal then," and the figure faded discreetly from sight. On the very next hole he did it. The ball just soared from his club in a perfect arc right into the hole. And for good measure, every other hole he played that round he holed in one. As he was putting his clubs away the figure in red appeared once more. "Now for our bargain," he said. "You remember you must give up half your sex life." The golfer frowned. "That gives me a bit of a problem," he said. "You're not backing out of this," cried the figure with a swish of its tail. "We'd struck a bargain and you agreed to it." "Yes, of course. But I do have a problem. Which half of my sex life do you want - the thinking or the dreaming?" Unique Gifts @ Perpetual Kid || Outrageous T-Shirts! |
Its All Humor |
| Meaning of Sharing in Marriage Posted: 13 Jun 2011 02:31 AM PDT Meaning of sharing in marriage... The old man placed an order for one plain hamburger, French fries and a drink. He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front of his wife. He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife. He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them . As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering. Obviously they were thinking, 'That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them.' As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said, they were just fine - they were used to sharing everything in their marriage. People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink. Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them. This time the old woman said 'No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything in our marriage.' Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked 'What is it you are waiting for?' She answered (Continue below - This is great) 'THE TEETH'  |
| You are subscribed to email updates from Its All Humor To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now. | Email delivery powered by Google |
| Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610 | |
